Allegiant by Veronica Roth (Spoilers)

Recommended For: 10+

Rating:  

Sentence: I sentence Veronica Roth to some time in what feels like an isolated/biodomed society where no one has a sense of humour.

Review: This book was meant to make or break this trilogy, really. I know that the majority of readers enjoyed the first book and were iffy, bored or disliked the second book. I despised the first book and was pleasantly surprised by the second book. I'm not sure who this third book will appeal to, but it certainly was not me. 

What was the point? That's the question you continuously ask yourself as you are reading this book. Because, honestly, I couldn't find anything that appealed to some greater story. There was some (obvious) betrayal, some obvious regrets, some obvious plans to escape, and some less obvious confessions on both Tris' and Four's parts (they finally hashed out what these shortcomings were and why they're both douches).

I could see how this book was not supposed to be about relationships, but I can also see how it failed. It was all about relationships. Everything was a relationship. Four and the hot Damaged Genes rebel (Nita, I think)? Relationship of curiosity and mutual respect/cause. Uriah and Christina? Relationship of possible adoration, possible lust, friendship. Uriah and Four? Relationship of negligence. Caleb and Tris? Relationship of distrust and love. David and Tris? Relationship of respect, loyalty and betrayal. Christina and Tris? Relationship of friendship, renewed loyalty, and guilt. Four and Amar? Relationship of loyalty, friendship, mentorship, love, and a subtle rift. Amar and George? Relationship of love, secrecy and purpose. Tris and Cara? Relationship of distrust and eventual mutual respect. Peter and Tris? Relationship of distrust and disrespect. Peter and Four? Relationship of distrust, and mutual understanding. Peter and Caleb? Relationship of mutual respect and understanding, and possible friendship.

I can keep going with this, but this is what I gathered from this book. I was able to categorize their relationships. It felt like it took most of the book for these things to be established and less than a quarter for an actual story to formulate. 

Unsurprisingly, someone betrayed someone else and things were not as they seemed outside of Chicago. Government is doing things wrong, so let's just rebel.

What about the people in the fringes? What about the factionless cities beyond Chicago? What about the other programs in place? Is it really a good idea to remain in factions? Not just that, now Roth introduced the concept of damaged genes versus divergent (pure) genes. Isn't this just another confusing categorization that will divide the human populace?

And you know what? In the end, it's all for nothing (or so it seems to the audience). After Uriah died I had already lost interest in the story, because Uriah was freaking awesome and hilarious. I sort of imagined a futuristic Fresh Prince.

And then after Tris' really anti-climactic death (I even think Katniss should have died at the end of Mockingjay, but nothing so lame as being shot several times. Come on, if 50 Cent could've survived it...), everything seemed even more grim. What's Tobias going to do? We already cannot trust his judgment and usually Tris did all the work. 

Future Earth is screwed, but it's okay, because most of us stopped caring through Tris and Tobias' twentieth almost-break up. Also, as mentioned by someone else's review I had the pleasure of reading, the science just doesn't make sense, but that was clear from the get-go since Roth seemed to be confusing behavioral modifications with gene therapy. 

Roth got in too deep and was all like:

And at the end of pointless deaths and small rebellions, it seems like everyone else is left standing asking themselves, "now what?"

The story was going nowhere and that's just how it ended. Perfectly nowhere.

Let's stop pretending...

I'm not sure if half of these are even true. I'm seeing a lot of classics that people would be expected to say are their favourites. I wish people would stop being ashamed of what they read. My favourite book is a lesser known YA novel by Diana Wynne Jones and I really could care less if people have read it or not. It has personal meaning to me rather than some breakthrough contribution to literature in general.

Although, got to agree with The Count of Monte Cristo. I love a good revenge tale. House of Leaves is also really good, but not really emotionally rendering.

http://www.buzzfeed.com/epicreads/28-ny-comic-con-cosplayers-and-their-favorite-book-8yaf

Giller Light Bash

I'm going because I booknerd. And I suggest you do too.

It's a party for nerds. Let's go!

The Selection by Kiera Cass

NOTE: I want to remind readers that it is important to give all books a fair chance despite negative reviews and controversy (see linked article)/the author or the author's agent being a dumbass. And that is what I did.

Rating: 

Sentence: I sentence Kiera Cass to a season of The Bachelor in which everyone is selected to be dropped off on a deserted island and are made to fight to the death (to be the lone survivor). But then, as a prize, the survivor has to marry some asshole she may or may not like.

Review: I wasn't really blown away by the cover, although I'd love to twirl around in a dress that freaking huge.

It'd probably go down like this though:

But really, I was excited for this bizarre twist on dystopian caste systems and competing with each other (yet again). What I found, however, was a cheap imitation of The Hunger Games meets The Bachelor meets A Little Princess (competition against nation of numbers for prince's hand in marriage, but with a little homesick orphan-like story time/bonding in their boarding school the palace). I wasn't sure whether to be pissed I had wasted my time or just relieved I had found something else to read to cleanse my mind afterward.

I settled on being productively angry at the world, through a chart, which I made to compare The Hunger Games to The Selection.

See this awesome chart.

Don't get me wrong, there were plenty of things different between the two books. Mostly how America is a total fucking pushover (see idiot) and signed up to change her life for her boyfriend's piece of mind. Then when he wanted her back she realized she had to see the Selection through because she is doing it for herself. Unless she's a gold digger, which might just be her reasoning. I do know she's a fucking narc though.

I have determined that America clearly doesn't know what the hell she wants, and needs to realize that if she is oh-so-good at giving the prince political advice, and is just as pretty as everyone claims she is, she needs to consider becoming a goddamn symbol of rebellion. Maybe even, heaven forbid, become a better person. Because that's where this is headed, isn't it? America: the symbol of freedom and rebellion. Now why does that sound familiar? Everything was so frakking predictable in this book.

<SPOILER ALERT>Even Aspen ending up in the palace as a guard. Puh-lease, I saw that even before Cass wrote this book. Oldest freaking romantic-triangle-coincidence in the playbook. Barney Stinson was so on that "oh, I happen to be stationed at your bedroom door" B.S. like three centuries seasons ago.

What really bothers me though, is that America lets herself continue this competition and to be pressured into falling in love with Maxon, who she seems to like as a friend. Oh wait, I forgot, it's impossible to be just friends when it's the prince, right? And I'm not saying she should go back to Aspen because, let's get real, his ego is bigger than Keira Cass' agent's ego. In any case, Aspen's pride comes before his need for food, which totally blows Maslow's hierarchy of needs out of the water. Speaking of inaccuracies, the caste system is totally contradictory. On the one hand, I'm imagining a real life caste system, but then you hear of a five and a six watching frakking television and having enough money for popcorn, at the end of the day. And even the eights seem to find a way to live and not be considered complete untouchables. What is this, a Disney version of caste divisions?

I think the worst part of all of this was finding out, upon finishing the last paragraph, that this was only the first volume in what was promising to be one of the worst teen series' (I'm assuming trilogy) I have ever read out of seriousness (not reading for the lulz).</SO ENDETH THE SPOILS>

Apparently the southerners are going to kill everyone in the palace before Maxon makes a decision. I won't stand for such tomfrakkery. This series is seriously over in my head and I won't hear of it again, much like Kelly Keaton's Darkness Becomes Her (that one made me physically vomit).

As I Wake by Elizabeth Scott

Note: Indignant spoilers.

Genre: Teen, drama, science fiction, medical, anomaly, other worlds, parallel universe, love, betrayal, parenting, death, life, survival, moving on, grief.

Recommended For: No one.

Rating: 

Sentence: I sentence Elizabeth Scott to another world where this story makes sense.

Review: When I read this book I realized why I had sworn off teen books for a month. Now don’t get me wrong, Scott is a wonderful writer. I’ve read much of her other works and some of them are my favourite pieces of teen literature. Even this book, in all its horribleness, is better than Twilight (and other teen lit. like it).

I get that Ava is all confused and amnesiac-like, after some unexplained collapse where I’m assuming she is “put in” to this world. I’m just gonna go ahead and say WTF? Let’s go over this very briefly.

1. Ava is remembering her parallel/actual life from another world. Clearly whoever meant to make her forget sucks at their fucking job.

2. Her friends in this universe are such shit-disturbers. So the lesbians I can sympathize with, but the psychotic-potential-killer asshole that tries to drug Ava? WHAT? How is she allowed to walk around with other human beings and why is nothing done about her? Come on, this is fiction-world. Let’s kill the bitch.

3. Ava is cold, annoying and I very much doubt she actually loves Morgan. Screw Clementine. I’d rather die in my own universe than a place I’d be trapped/lost forever. Besides, at least Morgan would go back with her that way.

4. What the hell is a SAT? PDM? Creche? I get there’s some sort of resistance, but what is Morgan? A freaking Mafia boss?

5. Basically, you get fuck-all from this story, except THE question. You’re so confused you question the meaning of life itself.

…42.

That was the most unsatisfying story I’ve ever read. It doesn’t instill rage because of its existence (again, like Twilight, Halo, Hush Hush, etc.), but instead this hollow feeling eats away at me—like I’ve reset my mind and I need to try again.

Legend by Marie Lu

Note: Spoiler ahead.

Genre: Teen, dystopian, plague, Les Miserables, caste, class system, military, war, biological warfare, romance, rebellion, media.

Recommended For: Everyone.

Rating: 

Sentence: I sentence Marie Lu to an Avatar: The Last Airbender marathon with me. I am good company, I promise.

Review: June, the heroine is bad ass and clever, but a little spoiled (with the ability to see things from other perspectives) and Day is just…well, Day. 

This story has so much potential because a) things DO happen. I know I said they talk about “things” happening, but they actually follow through. Not only does June (wo)man up; she also manages to break Day out of his executioning.

And b) the author does not hide the gory reality from the reader. People die-young, old, cripple, girls and guys. She introduces us to another form of mass genocide, through genetic and disease testing (see Eugenics and improving the human race).

So much of Legend parallels the realities of yesterday, today and tomorrow (but with more extremes in poverty within the region and such, as well as military) that I feel transported into Marie Lu’s world.

But here are my points of issue:

1. Everyone around June and Day seem to be dying. I’m not sure if this is a convenience thing for the story and plot or if it’s actually a hindrance to them.

2. Clearly Metias was killed by his buddy, insane-sociopath-that’s-into-younger-girls. He shows no remorse for killing and following orders blindly (if it means he gets to hurt someone). For being clever, June catches on a little late and isn’t careful of him when it matters the most. Also, it’s just weird that he’s into her when he’s her brother’s age. Seriously. As for her…is it not just a little crush? Oh god, now that goddamn Jennifer Paige song is stuck in my head.

3. Where the hell are they going again? To some rebel alliance thing (yay, Star Wars)? Oh wait, the colonies, right? I got caught up in Day’s brother being fucking killed, what!? Sorry.

You know that’s (seeking allegiance) not going to work out the way they plan. They’ll probably be split up. And then I’ll be worrying the entire second book whether they’ll be reunited. Jesus, I’m still pissed about Crossed by Ally Condie, haha.

4. I need me some more history. Please. The Republic and the Colonies. It probably makes for a great fucking story. Tell it.

But I love the alternate POVs and hope to see more of that later (perhaps with other characters as well). Also, I’m glad it didn’t end in the most ridiculous sort of cliffhanger ever. For that, Marie, you have my utter, heartfelt adoration. I hate when books use cliffhangers to keep people hooked to the series. They can keep us hooked by writing well.

BUT SRSLY, AVATAR NAO? And then we can eventually watch Korra after. 

Unwind by Neal Shusterman

Note: I doubt I’ll ever rate a teen novel this high, unless Neil Gaiman decides to write teen or Diana Wynne Jones rises from the dead. Beware of spoilers.

Genre: Teen, pre-teen, dystopian, political topics, realistic future, war, disarray, rebellion, inspirational.

Recommended For: Everyone…I am not exaggerating here.

Rating: 

Sentence: I sentence Neal Shusterman to writing all my ideas out for me in the beautiful, and oddly flowing way he does. Or follow me around while I dictate my entire life, for my own reference (because sometimes I wish I had a way of searching previous memories to the last detail). This could possibly be a form a torture for him. Sorry.

Review: I don’t even know where to start. I was skeptical when I picked up this rather sad and creepy looking book from a local bookstore. I had heard plenty, of course, but that doesn’t always pan out in my experience. Reading it was altogether different from what I expected.

It’s not the typical dystopian society where everything is explained to you right away. Actually, it’s better when things are clarified as you go along. From the beginning I found myself attached to Connor, even though I suspect I’d attempt to be a model 13-18 year old in order not to be unwound. But his absolute stubbornness in being his hot-headed self won me over. Then you meet Risa and Lev and suddenly all their stories collide (almost literally, haha) in this strange twist of chance. This opportunity saves them from their ultimate fate of being shipped off to a harvest camp and being used for their body parts. Not that they’re dead when they are unwound. They’re kept alive in the pieces they so graciously give away.

You see, after the pro-life versus pro-choice war, the Bill of Life changes everything. When a child is 13 to 18 years old their parents have the right to sign them off to be unwound, especially if they aren’t really doing any good (or living up to certain expectations). It’s a bit of the impure and savage masked by civility; something made acceptable by doing nothing and refusing to empathize.

This novel really reminded me of a mix of Repo! The Genetic Opera (with less of the chaos, disorder, gore…and singing) and season four of Torchwood: Miracle Day.

The way Shusterman makes the little things connect and flow is not so much mind-boggling as it is surprisingly pleasant. Because, let’s be honest, most teen lit. does not have much flow. Shusterman’s work is certainly something for teen authors to aspire to, along with John Green, Scott Westerfeld, Patrick Ness, Jessica Verday, and Holly Black.

I might have to read this book again and again and again. And the thought of that actually excites me.

This book has also convinced me to take a break from teen until I’m ready to re-visit things not up to par with his excellence. Yeah, I’m reading real fiction.